Archive for category Team Awesome Sauce
May 24, 2004 pt2 – Personal sercurity guard
Posted by Barniferous in Greater Tokyo Area, Shenanigans, Team Awesome Sauce on May 29, 2014
To recover from our long day out in Tokyo, we decided to walk around the my school near Kawasaki station. Our first stop was my usual internet cafe. The guys had never been into a manga / internet cafe before, and were impressed by the setup and the free drinks. If they could read Japanese we would have likely spent the day reading comics. Everyone made sure to send email to friends and family back home. Remember young travelers: always make sure your parents know you are safe and healthy, especially when it is your first time to be on the other side of the planet.
After catching up on email, we went to the big Yodobashi Camera near Kawasaki station. As we walked in, we passed a security guard who casually made a comment into the radio on his shoulder. He then proceeded to follow us around the store to keep an eye on us. Apparently when five young gaijins walk into an electronics store, they are up to no good.
Being five white guys who live in Canada, none of us had ever been followed around a store by a security guard before. I think the guys would have been more upset about it if they weren’t distracted by the huge selection of cool electronics in every direction. We literally examined EVERYTHING in the whole store, from TVs to video games to musical instruments. Generally the consumer electronics you can buy in Japan are at least several months ahead of what you can buy in Canada.
While walking around Yodobashi camera, you can’t escape the horrible store theme song, which is the famous “Battle Hymn of the Republic” aka “Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory”, but with lyrics about the store and what they sell. This also happens to be the same tune that Delta Upsilon Manitoba borrowed and turned into a song called “I Don’t Want to be a Phi Delt”. Phi Delta Theta was the second largest fraternity in Winnipeg, and were sworn rivals of Delta Upsilon. As we walked around, the guys started singing the modified lyrics. I won’t post the lyrics here, but there are verses about Phi Delts not being very fun, insinuations of what happens at a Phi Delt initiation, and derisive comments about Phi Delts’ skill with the opposite sex. I was happy that most of the people around us couldn’t understand English.
We likely spent almost two hours exploring Yodobashi camera, with our personal security guard casually following us around at a distance, but trying not to be too obvious about it. At one point we all turned and waved at him, which actually got him to crack a smile. We paid for our purchases and left allowing the security guard to return to his post and wait for the next batch of suspicious looking foreigners to follow around.
(2014 Update) Looking back, I have mixed feelings about the whole experience. I understand that theft is a big problem for stores, and they should be able to take reasonable precautions to protect their assets. Also, our personal security guard was never in our face, he was always a reasonable distance away, casually walking nearby. In my three years of living in Japan, this was the first time that I was ever followed around a store. I think I would feel a bit better if I knew that he followed us because we were a group of young males and not because we were a group of foreigners, but I will never know the true motive for sure.
There is racism in Japan, just like in every country. Being a white guy in Canada, I have never obviously been “profiled” before. It is an unusual experience to say the least. My friends and I simply ignored it because we were all short term visitors in the country and wanted to enjoy our vacation. However, if I was living in Japan full time I would not enjoy this kind of experience at all.
I wish I had some kind of clever way to end this post, maybe something with an uplifting message of peace, unity and brotherhood for the people of the world. Unfortunately I don’t, this whole topic is way more than a simple travel blog can handle.
Be good to each other.
May 24, 2004 pt1 – Don’t touch that!
Posted by Barniferous in Hello House, Lux, Shenanigans, Team Awesome Sauce on May 28, 2014
After our long day out in Tokyo, we got a very slow start to our Monday. We were all hanging out in the room that Flounder, Code Red and Green were sharing, talking about our upcoming plans. The room had a Japanese style closet with sliding door. Code Red moved his futon into the closet and turned it into a private bedroom. There were a lot of “in the closet jokes”. Code Red didn’t care, because the sliding door gave him some relief from Flounder and Green’s horrific drunken snoring.
In the previous evening, we purchased a number of sex cans (that’s the nicest way I can describe them) from Don Quijote. We opened one of them up to inspect it, and in doing so accidentally removed the label. It was a plastic can with a pink sponge on top. In the middle of the sponge was a hole. Inside the hole were various flexible bumps and other textures, as well as a lubricant. If you need a description of what a sex can is used for, you are too young to hear a description of what a sex can is used for.
Lux and Katsuragi came to hang out with us and ask us about our plans for the day. While we were talking, the plastic can caught Katsuragi’s attention. She asked what it was, and nobody said anything. She then put her finger into the hole on top. At this exact moment, one of the guys caught the fantastic picture above of Lux’s expression of horror. Katsuragi came to a sudden realization of what the product was for, and then chased me down the hall attempting to rub the can lube from her finger on my shirt.
Totally worth 600 yen!
May 23, 2004 pt3 – Everything is jumbo in Canada
Posted by Barniferous in Drinking, Hello House, Team Awesome Sauce, Tokyo on May 27, 2014
Green meets Shibuya girls
After getting a taste of beer at Shakey’s Pizza, we decided that we would really enjoy some more beer. We boarded the Yamanote line and headed for Shibuya. The area around Shibuya station is always entertaining for visitors. Between the massive crowds of people, the tall buildings, the giant video screens, the lights, and the noise it is a great way to get overstimulated. After wandering around for a while we headed to GasPanic for cheap beer.
As much as some people talk badly about GasPanic (with good reason), it is easy to find, has cheap drinks, and has no problems with five casually dressed, thirsty foreigners. We managed to find a table and ordered two pitchers. Green used one of the pitchers as his own personal drink, while the rest of us filled our glasses from the other pitcher.
We hung out at GasPanic for a some time getting more than a little drunk. It was a Sunday night, so GasPanic was not exactly lively. I convinced the group that while we were in Shibuya, we could be having more fun at Don Quijote. The problem was that I was full of beer and don’t know Shibuya well. It took several wrong turns, but we finally found the giant smiling penguin and proceeded to enter the most fun store in the country.
It is not terribly surprising that 5 drunk 20 something males will eventually end up in the adult toy section. The guys marveled at the wide variety of products available. They were particularly interested in the disposable sex cans for men. At this point I decided this would make the best souvenir ever and generously offered to buy some for them to take home. While Code Red, Flounder and Hippie went to other parts of the store, I got Green to hold out his arms and proceeded to stack up 8 sex cans. Since we didn’t want to keep walking around the store while carrying the sex cans, Green and I started to make our way towards the cash register. Finding the way out of DonKi is difficult at the best of times. Finding the way out of DonKi after several beers is even more challenging. On one of our many wrong turns Green dropped the entire stack of sex cans all over the floor. The other shoppers looked on in amused horror as he tried to gather them all up again while I stood by and laughed.
I paid for the sex cans, then Green and I met the others outside. We were getting pretty close to the last train, so we decided to call it a night and returned to Shibuya Station. From Shibuya we took Yamanote line to Shinjuku, then boarded Odakyu line towards Noborito. On the Odakyu train, Flounder was standing and holding onto the train grip. Two Shibuya girls were standing next to him. For those who don’t know, Shibuya girls are fashionable looking young females with fake tans, coloured hair, and lots of accessories on their phones. Without any warning, one of them reached over and started stroking Flounder’s arm hair. He looked down and said hi. She looked up at him and said “You are jumbo”. Flounder calmly replied “I’m from Canada. Everything is jumbo in Canada”.
Not wanting to be left out, Green reached into his backpack, past the 8 sex cans, to find my copy of “Making Out in Japanese“, a hilarious phrasebook for casual Japanese in different situations. He tried out a few lines, but his pronunciation was so terrible that the Shibuya girls couldn’t understand what he was talking about. Most notably, he attempted several times to say “kiss me” which is pronounced “key-soo she-tay”. Green kept reading the romaji as “kiss-oo shitty”. Green finally got fed up and just pointed at the line in the book. The girls thought this was hilarious and then sat down and started reading the book while laughing at the most ridiculous phrases.
Nobody ended up getting any kisses, but we got several pictures with the Shibuya girls while they were laughing at Making Out in Japanese. We got back to Hello House and hung out with Lux explaining our awesome day in Tokyo.
May 23, 2004 pt2 – Shakey’s Pizza
Posted by Barniferous in Drinking, Team Awesome Sauce, Tokyo on May 26, 2014
The Tower of Beer at Shakey’s Pizza in Harajuku
After an eventful afternoon at Meiji Shrine and Yoyogi park we were looking for some food. Not knowing what our options were, we decided to wander around Harajuku looking for food that would make everyone happy. I am good with almost anything, but two members of our group didn’t like fish. There were nearly unlimited options, but as soon as we saw a sign for Shakey’s Pizza our minds were made up. Mmmmm pizza!
Harajuku is home to one of the few Shakey’s Pizza restaurants in the country. In addition to some familiar pizzas that we could find at home, they also offered Japanese style pizza covered with corn and seafood. We paid good money for some small but delicious pizzas.
When considering our drink options we found a menu item called “Tower of Beer”. Naturally we had no choice but to order it. The Tower of Beer is tall glass cylinder on a base with a spout. It holds an impressive 4 litres of beer. When divided 5 ways it is not a lot of beer for each person, but the experience of the Tower of Beer is totally worth it. All of the other beer drinkers in the restaurant were drinking out of boring regular glasses. Our beer was in a TOWER.
At some point Hippie went off to find the washroom. He came back extremely excited, and informed us that the bathroom had one of Japan’s famous high tech toilets. A Japanese high tech toilet is a toilet with a control panel that operates various features such as adjustable strength water jets, air fresheners, heated seats, and sound effects to cover up any bathroom noises you are making. After Hippie’s announcement, everyone in our group took turns trying out the high tech toilet. We ended up monopolizing the men’s washroom for the next 15 minutes.
One of the best things about being in a foreign country is that almost everything is a bit different, so even mundane things like ordering beer or using the toilet can be a fun adventure. Just remember to stop the bum spray before you stand up – trust me.
May 23, 2004 pt1 – Meiji Shirne and Yoyogi Park
Posted by Barniferous in Team Awesome Sauce, Tokyo, Uncategorized on May 25, 2014
Team Awesome Sauce at Meiji Shrine
On Sunday there is always something interesting going out near Meiji Shrine. Instead of our usual breakfast routine, we all grabbed convenience store breakfast and got on the train. From Noborito we took the Odakyu line to Shinjuku, then took Yamanote line to Harajuku. At Harajuku we walked out towards the entrance of Meiji shrine.
On the bridge towards Meiji shrine you can find a bunch of cosplayers hanging out. Most of the cosplayers were dressed as anime characters or members of visual kei bands. The costumes were all fantastically detailed. For some reason there were also two people dressed in Nazi uniforms. You simply could not do that in Canada (or the US, the UK, etc etc). There were a lot of cosplayers, but apparently if the weather was nicer there would have been many more.
After the bridge, we toured Meiji shrine, a Shinto shrine dedicated to Emperor Meiji and his wife. Meiji Shrine was under construction from 1915 to 1926, with the main building being destroyed in World War II and rebuilt thanks to a public fundraising effort in the late 50s. The shrine and grounds are impressive, giving you the feeling that you have escaped Tokyo. We were lucky enough to catch parts of a traditional Japanese wedding while we were there.
After the Shrine, we wandered around Yoyogi Park, which is always lively. I lost track of how many bands we saw playing. There were also some girls singing and dancing along with Japanese pop music. Hippie was the only person brave enough to attempt to talk to them afterwards. We stopped for a quick snack at a takoyaki stand. The guys heard “tako” and thought Mexican food (taco). They were a little surprised to see the fried dough balls filled with octopus and covered in sauce. Everyone tried one, but once again Hippie was the hero eating two octopus balls at once. Naturally we made several immature jokes about this.
On the way out of Yoyogi park, we saw the famous rockabilly dancers that show up every weekend. They have leather pants, sunglasses, and crazy pompadours, and dance to loud rockabilly music while drinking beer. If you are ever in Yoyogi park on the weekend, you can’t leave until you see these guys.
The first part of our day at the Shrine and park were pretty fun, but we were just getting started. More to come!
(2014 Update) Check out this post about Yoyogi Park with awesome pictures on a superior blog here: http://lifetoreset.wordpress.com/2012/02/02/rock-and-roll-at-yoyogi-park/
May 22, 2004 pt2 – Game Centres and Kabukicho
Posted by Barniferous in Team Awesome Sauce, Tokyo on May 24, 2014
Hippie enjoying the fantastic Taiko drumming game “Taiko no Tatsujin”
In the evening we decided to head out for some adventure. We started in a small game center (arcade) in Noborito. It was fun, but the selection of games was lacking. Seeking bigger and better things we got on the Odakyu line for Shinjuku.
Shinjuku at night is amazing. All of the tall buildings are lit up brightly, and the streets are full of people looking for restaurants, bars, and other good times. We spent some time in a big game center, with the main attraction being the awesome Taiko drumming game “Taiko no Tatsujin” which is pictured above. The game was a huge hit, and anyone from a complete beginner to a taiko master could enjoy it. We also enjoyed a fun version of “House of the Dead” called “Typing of the Dead”. Instead of using a gun to shoot zombies, you used a keyboard to type in the names that appeared in front of them. After spending time and money on video games, the guys requested to see something else. I told them that there was a red light district nearby, which naturally caught their attention.
I had never been to Kabukicho before, but I knew generally where it was. Combined with some street signs and maps we wandered through the congested, bright, bustling streets of Shinjuku. Before we went into the area, I told the guys that we were under no circumstances going to be going into any of the businesses in the area. I also warned them that there were likely to be aggressive touts vying for our attention. As soon as we passed through the famous gates onto one of the sketchier looking streets, we were approached by various men advertising different establishments and the services they offered. We were told in English about hostess bars with school girl themes, places where we could watch women showering, and one place where we could meet the attractive women on the sign and do “whatever we want”. One of the touts grabbed onto Hippie’s arm and tried to lead him into a place promising “titties that would change his life”. The only person in our group that received no attention at all was Flounder, who stood head and shoulders above everyone in the area. He was not approached by a single tout.
One quick loop of the area was enough, and we wandered around different parts of Shinjuku before calling it a night.
(2014 update 1) Starting in around 2006 there was a massive cleanup effort in Kabukicho that apparently cleaned up the area. I am sure that it is still an interesting place to walk through, but it likely won’t be the same experience we had in 2004.
(2014 update 2) Typing of the Dead is now available on Steam!!
May 22, 2004 pt1 – Chocolate Love Stick
Posted by Barniferous in Greater Tokyo Area, Hello House, Team Awesome Sauce on May 23, 2014
I woke up “early” and went out with Hippie to Shop 99 to buy materials for a big breakfast. As a group we decided to rotate breakfast cooking responsibilities daily. Flounder cooked scrambled eggs, bacon and toast for the group.
After eating we went to Daiei supermarket for shopping and sightseeing. Going to a supermarket in a foreign country is always fun. Like me, the guys noticed the small shopping carts, the tiny meat section, the huge fish section, and the different products available. They particularly liked the horrible jingle that kept playing on repeat in the meat section. We got some supplied for breakfasts and lunches, and in addition picked up some mini donuts and Giant Pocky.
Other than groceries, we took some time looking around the department store. The guys were shocked by the “Black Music” section in the music store. In addition to rock, pop and classical, many music stores in Japan feature a section called “black music”. In it you will find rap, reggae, and R&B by artists of all skin tones. This name would be horribly inappropriate back home.
We returned to Hello House and worked out our schedule for the next few weeks while listening to Code Red’s music purchase – a CD of Japanese bands covering Green Day songs. While hanging out, we broke out the snacks from earlier. The donuts came in a box. Inside the box was a bag. Inside that bag were 36 small donuts individually wrapped in plastic. The amount of over-packaging in Japan is shocking, especially considering the strict rules about disposing of garbage.
The Giant Pocky was just like regular Pocky, but huge. While Hippie was in the middle of talking about something, someone (likely Flounder) jammed a Giant Pocky into his mouth and yelled “CHOCOLATE LOVE STICK!!”. My friends and I were never considered the most mature adults around.
May 21, 2004 pt2 – My friend is Canada
Posted by Barniferous in Drinking, Hello House, Team Awesome Sauce on May 22, 2014
Me and Code Red in Shinjuku on the way back from the airport
When the guys got back to Hello House, we organized the sleeping arrangements. Hippie would be staying on the foldy floor couch in my room, while Flounder, Code Red and Green would be sharing the extra room that I rented for their stay. Fortunately for them, the extra room had a bed. Flounder and Green agreed to alternate nights in the bed and on the floor, while Code Red set up a futon in the closet.
After unpacking, the travelers got their first experience with Hello House’s coin operated showers. After showers and a quick tour of Hello House, we set out in search of beer.
Since it was Friday night, all of the izakayas in the area were very busy. In my first three choices I was told that there would be a two hour wait, which didn’t work for us. As we walked from place to place looking for a beer, we attracted a lot of attention from the locals. It wasn’t often that they saw five enthusiastic gaijins walking around the Noborito area. One of the highlights came when I was not paying attention to where I was walking and managed to walk directly into a pole designed to separate the street from the sidewalk. The pole was just at the right height to hit me in my lower nether regions as I passed over it. The other highlight was a very drunk girl who started talking to us in English while her boyfriend held her up. When we told her we were Canadian she proudly replied “My friend is Canada!”.
We eventually ended up at an izakaya on the other side of Mukogaokayuen station that was full of hard drinking Japanese people. When I say hard drinking, I mean stumbling to the bathroom, puking, then coming back to finish their beer drinking. The frat guys approved. We ordered beer and izakaya food. Flounder and Green tried sashimi for the first (and probably last) time. After the bar we returned to Hello House to watch a bootleg copy of Wrestlemania while drinking some of the ample supplies of alcohol that the guys brought from Canada. It was a great first night!
(2014 update) It turns out that the izakaya staff were trying to tell me that there would be a 2 hour limit on our table, not a 2 hour wait. My Japanese was still pretty bad at the time.
May 21, 2004 pt1 – Narita Airport
Posted by Barniferous in Team Awesome Sauce on May 21, 2014
I’m not this short – I was crouching down. From left to right: Flounder, Green, me, Hippie, Code Red.
My friends finally arrived today! I woke up early to tidy and vacuum my room. Before I left I pulled out my bright yellow Delta Upsilon Manitoba shirt and headed off to Narita airport on the slow trains. This involved taking the Odakyu line from Noborito to Shinjuku, the Yamanote line to Nippori, and the Keisei line to the airport.
After 2 hours in transit I arrived at Narita Terminal 2 about 20 minutes before the guys flight arrived. I left the train station in the basement of the airport, went through a security check, and then wandered around the terminal. The guys were flying a terrible flight from Winnipeg through Chicago to Narita Airport on United. In the arrivals area I couldn’t find their flight listed at all. After looking around at the signs I realized that United lands at Narita Terminal 1, so I was in the wrong terminal.
There were signs for a bus to terminal 1, but since I was more familiar with trains in Japan I bought a ticket and went back to the train platform. On the platform I learned that the next train between Terminal 2 and Terminal 1 was in 30 minutes. I tried to go back into the airport, but the train gate closed on me. I then attempted to use all of my Japanese skills to explain my situation to the train staff. Fortunately they understood and took pity on me. I walked away with a refund and directions to the bus which leaves every few minutes between the terminals.
Thanks to the incredibly slow lines in immigrations and customs I had to wait about an hour before my friends actually came into the arrival area. The entire time I had people staring at my bright yellow DU shirt. The shirt was very bright, but it did make me extremely easy to find in the crowd. After exchanging greetings and manly hugs, the guys showed me the souvenirs they brought from Canada; a case of Kraft Dinner and a 12 of Moosehead beer. I am so Canadian.
While the guys took turns exchanging money and cashing in travelers cheques, I was approached by an unlicensed taxi driver who offered to drive us to Kawasaki. I know he was unlicensed because no taxi drivers are allowed to solicit business in the airport terminal. I expect that our cab ride from Narita to Hello House would have been extremely expensive. I finally got him to leave and we bought tickets for the Narita Express.
Just like when I arrived months earlier, we changed trains in Shinjuku during rush hour. I took the group outside to get their first look at the Shinjuku skyline and mobs of people. If you ever bring people to Japan I recommend doing this. We changed to the Odakyu line and traveled the rest of the way to Hello House incident free. The Team Awesome Sauce adventure was about to begin!
Team Awesome Sauce Presents…
Posted by Barniferous in Friends and coworkers, Team Awesome Sauce on May 20, 2014
Over the next month you will get to read all about the crazy adventures when my fraternity friends came to visit me in Japan. They were only in the country for about two and a half weeks, but some days require multiple posts. This will also help bridge the gap before my next set of visitors.
When I moved to Japan, I put out an open invitation to my friends and fraternity brothers to come and visit anytime. Many were interested, but only 4 managed to get the time and money required for an international adventure. During their long flight they gave themselves a nickname which stuck for the rest of the trip. Faithful readers: please allow me to introduce to you – Team Awesome Sauce.
Green – if you look up “frat boy” in a dictionary, you will likely find Green. Never afraid to have another beer or remove his shirt in public. Eventual chapter president.
Hippie – so named for his flowing hippie hair. Possibly the most sensible one of the group, although that’s not saying much. Was eventually in my wedding party years later.
Flounder – bigger than a sumo wrestler, flounder was a former chapter president and world champion shit disturber. Also the only person I have ever met to successfully complete the 4 liter milk jug challenge.
Code Red – was considered the most likeable one of the group. Alternated between flat hair and an awesome attention getting mohawk.
Drinking in Japan 
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