February 6, 2006 part 2 – Proposal aftermath
Posted by Barniferous in Friends and coworkers, The Penpal on June 8, 2016
It had been just minutes since I had proposed to my girlfriend, The Penpal. After coming down from the emotional high, we started to discuss the next steps.
When I seized the opportunity to propose, I had completely excluded her parents from the decision process. She told me that she would have to talk to them and get their blessing. I told her that I wanted to talk to my family as well, and we decided that we would not tell everyone else until our parents had been given some time to process the idea.
I immediately called my parents. It was Monday evening in Japan, which meant early morning in central Canada. I managed to catch my dad at home on his way out the door. I asked if both he and my mom were free, but I heard my mom yelling in the background that she was busy getting ready for work, so my dad got to hear the news first. There was silence on his end of the phone for a minute, then he yelled for my mom to come to the phone immediately! Both of them were very excited for us!
After that I had to call my sister, who was still asleep. Before she had a chance to worry about an early call from her brother in Japan I told her the news. This woke her up instantly. Her response was “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! I’m going to have a sister in law!!!”.
The Penpal and I talked for a while, and she went home to break the news to her parents. I asked if she wanted me to come, but she said it might be better if she could explain it to them by herself. She left, and I found myself home alone, bursting with excitement. I felt like I should do something to celebrate, but didn’t know what to do. Not able to come up with any ideas, I decided to walk across the street to 7-11. Near the alcohol section (yes, 7-11 sells alcohol in Japan), I found a bottle of cheap sparkling wine, which was the closest thing to a champagne that they offered. I paid for it and considered telling the cashier my news for some reason.
When I returned home, Palmer was there along with one of his girlfriends. I walked into the living room with my bottle of wine grinning and said “guess what I did”. Palmer tried to read the expression on my face, and then slowly guessed “you got her pregnant?”. I said no, so he guessed “you got engaged?”. I said yes and then opened the cheap sparkling wine for the three of us to share.
I am aware that I am kind of doing things in the wrong order, but too excited to care at the moment 🙂
February 6, 2006 part 1 – A modest proposal
Posted by Barniferous in The Penpal on June 7, 2016
Today started off like any other Monday. I had the day off and The Penpal came over to visit when she was finished work. Usually she is in a pretty good mood, but tonight she was a bit down.
Over the past few months we had been talking about my return to Canada when I finish teaching English. I asked her to move to Canada with me and she accepted. Over the weekend she finally talked to her parents about the idea, and they were not at all excited about the idea of their only daughter moving half way around the world to live with her boyfriend. She said that her parents wouldn’t have any problem with the idea if we were married, but wouldn’t approve if we were just dating.
At this point I had a lot of things go through my head: the Penpal and I have been together for a few years now, and we were very happy. I had been in some longer relationships before, but none of them felt the same way as my relationship with The Penpal. Despite growing up in very different cultures, we just connect and compliment each other.
I thought about returning to Canada without her and instantly felt a pit in my stomach. I thought about being home and starting another search for a girlfriend and that felt even worse. The Penpal was my companion, someone I wanted to be around for a long time to come. Someone I never wanted to be without.
I don’t know how long I sat there thinking about all of these things. But eventually I decided to do something. I took her hands in mine and told her that I didn’t want to be apart from her. Ever. She told me the same thing. I then asked her if she would marry me.
She accepted!!
This was not the proposal I ever imagined before. There was no fanfare, no romantic dinner with a ring cleverly hidden away, no beautiful scenery, and I didn’t have a ring. It was just the two of us sitting on my floor couch, the first piece of furniture we shopped for together, in my oddly shaped room in a company apartment. There is something to be said giant romantic proposals, but in this case the opportunity was there, I took it, and I am very VERY happy that I did!
Holy crap I’m engaged!
January 30, 2006 – Planning for the Future
Posted by Barniferous in The Penpal on June 7, 2016
Today was a typical Monday – I had the day off and caught up on being relaxed. In the evening The Penpal came over after work and we ordered food and hung out.
Since my friend UPS had come to visit, I had been seriously thinking about returning to Canada. I enjoy teaching English, but know it won’t be my career. The biggest problem would be leaving The Penpal behind. We had talked before about her moving to Canada, but tonight we actually seriously discussed the idea. I was happy to hear that she was not only interested, but actually excited about the idea of moving to Canada and living with me!
Japan and Canada have a Working Holiday Visa that allows people under a certain age to work and travel in the other country for up to a year. We decided that when I returned to Canada (likely before the end of the year), that she would apply for a working holiday visa and come with me. That gives us a year to see how we enjoy living together and how she enjoys being away from home before we have to make any other decisions.
She told me that she would talk to her parents about the idea, and we parted ways both happy, excited, and very much looking forward to new adventures together.
January 2006 – Multiple girlfriends (not mine)
Posted by Barniferous in Azeroth, Friends and coworkers on May 29, 2016
In most of the stories on this blog I write about my adventures with teaching, my life in Japan, or how much karaoke and beer I enjoyed the night before. However, from the end of 2005 one of my roommates had an interesting story happening which I never wrote about at the time (for reasons that will quickly become obvious).
When I moved in to my company apartment in 2004, Palmer was dating a youthful Japanese woman who spent a LOT of time in our apartment. She had a key and came and went whenever she felt like it. I’m sure this was a good arrangement for her and Palmer, but it annoyed Azeroth and I. The worst situation was when I had The Penpal over for some private time, and Palmer’s girlfriend came out of the shower wearing a towel. To be fair, Azeroth and I were not the world’s best roommates, but Palmer’s girlfriend, even though we liked her, was a regular source of stress at the apartment.
Near the end of 2005, Palmer broke up with his girlfriend and hit the rebound market pretty hard. He was tall, confident, fit, and fluently bilingual, which are all good qualities when you are on the prowl in Japan. Over beers we had learned that he was interested in two different female students at our branch. Note: for those who haven’t been reading, we worked at a conversational English school, so the students were mostly adults. Both of these ladies were in their 20s, and were regulars at our NOVA branch.
I guess he was working his charms on both of them to see if something would pan out. Somehow he managed to end up dating both of them at the same time!
NOVA policy strictly forbids teachers from interacting with students outside of the classroom. Most of the teachers did anyway, with the knowledge that if the supervisors didn’t catch you in the act, they probably wouldn’t say anything. In this case, Palmer WAS a supervisor. It was risky, but both of the students were aware of the policy and the position that they were in, so they were very good at keeping things quiet. This was convenient for Palmer, both for not getting in trouble, and it helped keep his two girlfriends from finding out about each other!
This arrangement presented some interesting situations. We would have one of them over to hang out at the apartment, and the other one would be over the next night. When he would be out with one, he would be very careful where he went. He had a very distinctive appearance, so it was easy to spot him in a crowd.
The most stressful situation happened at work; he ended up having both of his girlfriends in the same VOICE class (open conversation classroom) at the same time. He told us later that it was the longest 40 minutes of his teaching career!!
I’m not going to make any judgements about his behaviour (let he who is without sin…). I can say that it helped make life more interesting for not only Palmer, but his roommates Azeroth and I for the few months that this arrangement lasted.
January 12, 2006 – Still haven’t been away long enough
Posted by Barniferous in Teaching English on May 24, 2016
My vacation is over. Today I returned to my regular Thursday routine of a private Japanese lesson in the morning followed by teaching English in the afternoon and evening.
I still haven’t been away from work long enough to want to come back!
January 11, 2006 part 2 – How not to use a sento
Posted by Barniferous in Life in Japan, Tokyo, Visitors on May 13, 2016

Image courtesy of the good folks at Wikipedia
January 11, 2006 part 1 – Finding Capsule Land
Posted by Barniferous in Drinking, Friends and coworkers, Visitors on May 12, 2016
Disclaimer: UPS is the nickname of one of my friends visiting Japan. This post has nothing to do with United Parcel Service.
After an eventful evening in Roppongi where we drank at 5 different bars, UPS and I were looking for a place to sleep for the night. I was happy to find a nearby hotel, but UPS insisted that on his last night in Japan he wanted to stay in a capsule hotel.
A capsule hotel is a cheap option for a place to sleep if you don’t have a problem with small spaces. Instead of a room, you rent a small capsule to sleep in for the night. I had heard of capsule hotels before I moved to Japan, but had never stayed in one. In the interests of being a good host and trying new things, I agreed and decided to use my Japanese language skills to find us a capsule hotel.
We walked towards the big Koban across from Roppongi station. The police officer at the front appeared a bit nervous as we approached, probably because he had interacted with more than his share of drunk foreigners in English before. He appeared to relax when I greeted him politely in and managed to ask him where the nearest capsule hotel was in decent Japanese. This was particularly impressive considering the amount of beer I had consumed over the evening. The officer told me that there were no capsule hotels in Roppongi and that I would have better luck in Shibuya. Since the trains had already stopped, he pointed out where the nearest taxi stand was. I thanked him and we were on our way.
The taxi driver did not seem too pleased about transporting two obviously drunk gaijins somewhere after 2:00am. We were fascinated by the street level view of one of the world’s biggest cities. The cab ride didn’t take long and cost about 1200 yen ($12).
We got out at the Hachiko exit at Shibuya station, and I asked directions from a nearby Koban while UPS hung out at the famous dog statue. Hachiko is a well known meeting place, and after explaining the story I got a picture of a very tired looking UPS next to Japan’s most loyal dog. We set out for a large capsule hotel building called “Capsule Land” which was just up the street.

On the way we had another interesting encounter; UPS managed to get propositioned by a street prostitute. For real.
I didn’t even think there were any street prostitutes in Japan, so this was all the more surprising. As we slowly walked up the hill, she said “hi”, put her head on his shoulder, and said in an adorable voice “Sex? Sex??”. UPS said no thank you. She nodded her head yes while saying, slightly more confidently, “Sex! Sex.” this time as a statement, not a question. We somehow politely removed ourselves from her rather pleasant company and laughed about the ridiculous situations we had experienced during the evening while we continued walking to Capsule Land.
There aren’t too many other situations where talking to two police officers and a hooker would constitute a good evening. I love having visitors!
Back (very) soon
Posted by Barniferous in Uncategorized on May 3, 2016
For those few regular readers out there, my hiatus is almost over. I am getting settled in my new job, home renos are done, and life is returning to whatever can be considered “normal” with an active 2 year old in the house. Basically, I have some time to blog again.
Other than reliving some great memories, one of my favourite things about Drinking in Japan (the blog, not the activity) was the fact that I could repost my original stories 10 years after they happened. With the break I took I have some catching up to do. I expect that I will be posting more than once a day until I have caught up with the story before the end.
Coming up in the next few months:
- The ending of UPS’s visit to Japan, including stories about male frontal nudity!
- An change in my relationship with The Penpal!
- Ninja museum!
- Green beer!
- A night out in Osaka!
- A visit from parents!
- Random stories about students and teachers!
- Facial hair growth!
- A farewell tour!
Thanks for your patience, and I hope you enjoy reading about my adventures.
-DIJ
Temporary posting delays
Posted by Barniferous in Uncategorized on February 5, 2016
Hello dear readers, you may have noticed a lack of updates recently. Since I have started the project to revive and update my Japan blog from 10 years ago, I have been proud of being able to post things 10 years to the day after they happened.
Unfortunately real life has decided to get in the way temporarily. In between starting a new job and basement renovations, I have not had a lot of free time to work on posting. I am hoping to catch up and be back on my regular schedule in a few weeks.
Thanks for your patience!
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